http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIh2xe4jnpk
*Sigh* Just when I thought pop music couldn’t be more immature. Don’t get me wrong, whenever I hear this song, it’s catchy, it has a nice beat, and I get that, to an extent, it’s meant to come across as a “sweet” thing where “nothing will get in the way of our love” whatever… but no.
In the beginning of the song, and yes I’m pulling actual lyrics, he says “Knocked on your door with heart in my hand/ To ask you a question/ ‘Cause I know you’re an old-fashioned man.” So yes, he’s starting this marriage proposal thing out right, ya know, he knows her dad will want to be given the opportunity to give his blessing, whatever. Cool. So he goes and asks. So far so good, right?
BUT THEN DADDY SAYS NO. So what does he do? Say “Okay, I respect your decision, what can I do to prove to you that I am the right man for your daughter?” HA nope. That would be respectful and mature.
INSTEAD he decides to say (whether out loud or not, I don’t really think it matters), “Why you gotta be so rude?/ Don’t you know I’m human too?/ Why you gotta be so rude?/ I’m gonna marry her anyway.”
Yes. Because THAT’S definitely the way to win somebody’s respect. “Oh, you said no? Well fuck you, I’m gonna do it anyway because you’re a douche.” Right. No.
Now, I don’t really like the whole “asking for the girl’s hand in marriage” thing anyway, like, by the time someone proposes to a girl, she’s PROBABLY mature enough to make that decision for herself. My dad, as much as I love him, shouldn’t really get much of a say in whom I marry. I mean, if I were to get into a relationship with a complete piece of scum, I expect SOMEONE in my family to maybe say something (regardless of whether I listen. I’m hard-headed. And a strong, independent… erm… woman who don’t need no man). But ultimately, the marriage decision is mine and mine alone. I’m 21. I’m gonna make my own mistakes, regardless of whether my parents try not to let me. It’s gonna happen. Hopefully I don’t end up marrying the wrong man, but hey. Realistically, it’ll happen with or without my daddy’s blessing.
But anyway. Regardless of the bullshit that is asking a girl’s dad for her hand in marriage (in my opinion, of course), if you know her dad wants that, and you respect that wish, and he says no, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK GOING AGAINST HIS WISHES IS GOING TO HELP YOUR CAUSE?! Because I promise you, it won’t. And if she values her daddy’s opinion, as many girls do (myself included, even though I am defiant and convinced I know best sometimes), she’s not going to be thrilled when she finds out (and she will, I promise. Girls know everything. Also Daddy is liable to warn her about the incident.) that you KNEW her dad didn’t approve and you defied him anyway. That’s not how that tradition works. If you’re gonna do the traditional thing, respect the tradition. Don’t just go through the motions.
nerdinessandpolitics 